MEGA Highlights

Revisit Past Articles & Back Stories.

Some are interesting history
others still continue to evolve

All the Articles /Images / Comments on this MEGA Highlights page have appeared on our front pages previously. Most remain unaltered, except for those which are still on topics that are still developing and which have new updates mostly coming from the subject matter and from the community. We will also correct mistakes and make apologies where it is appropriate to do so. 

Check Back on MEGA Highlights 
We Update Regularly
Hydrants, Hatches & Silence
April 2025

MEGA Sounds the Alarm Eastbourne’s firefighters have raised a red flag—faulty, failing hydrants across the Hutt. Poorly maintained, some don’t work at all. Quiet? Not anymore.

East-West Electric Ferry
April 2025

Turns out the future was plugged in—just needed a longer cord.
May?

From Trees to Tragedy?
April 2025

Williams Park lost its greenery to a Council plan of poles, signs, EV bits and a lonely 'bus' shelter. Progress? You tell us. 

Hutt Council’s ‘Significance’ Plan Backfires
April 2025

It’s being called insulting, divisive, and needlessly complex—especially by Eastbourne’s elderly. Another triumph in overthinking the obvious.

MEGA Predicted
March 2025

The Hutt’s political shuffle is on: Barry exits for Parliament, Tui eyes the mayoralty, Ginny rides the list, and Bish reigns supreme. Underdogs lurk. Drama guaranteed.

From Cell to Stalemate
March 2025

Once a quaint jailhouse, now a rusting relic. Bought for $1, promised a new home—still rotting in Williams Park. Time to post bail and move on.

The Colonel Cometh
 to Lowry Bay? 
Finger-Lickin'
History Under Threat!

Just when you thought Eastbourne couldn't get any tastier—or perhaps greasier—word on the salty streets is that the venerable Skerrett Boat Shed in Lowry Bay, a cherished Edwardian icon dating back to 1906, may soon be trading nautical knots for chicken buckets.
Yes, you've read that right: the historical gem, might soon find itself home to the Colonel's famous 11 herbs and spices. Can it survive the tidal wave of drive-thru customers seeking crispy thighs and drumsticks?
Naturally, not everyone in Lowry Bay is thrilled. While Wanaka's recent McDonald's fiasco ended with locals flipping more than burgers to halt the golden arches, notoriously conservative locals are already preparing to deep fry this crispy invasion with heated letters, scathing petitions, and whispered threats of civil unrest—or at least strongly worded objections at the next Council meeting.
Lowry Bay could soon be a landmark for entirely new reasons, as passing traffic picks up not just historical vibes but takeaway orders too. 
[April 2025]

Eastbourne Goes Au Naturel: Clothing Optional Zone
 at Days Bay

In a bold move that’s sure to raise eyebrows and maybe a few goosebumps, Hutt City Council has quietly approved a new “clothing optional” area at the northern end of Days Bay Beach.
The pilot initiative, comes after “months of cheeky lobbying” championed by local group MEGA, encourages body positivity, freedom of expression, and perhaps a little Vitamin D in unexpected places. “We believe Eastbourne should be open-minded — and occasionally open-cheeked,” said a MEGA spokesperson. “This is all part of a broader plan to “liberate Eastbourne, one buttock at a time.”
Enthusiastic Locals are already making the most of the relaxed dress code, with sunbathers of all shapes and ages already embracing what could be the new normal. Reactions range from enthusiastic applause to nervous side-eyes, but most agree it’s added a fresh breeze to the coastal community.
Council sources hinted that a trial will run through next summer, with full review in autumn – weather and public decency complaints permitting.
Sun’s out, buns out, Eastbourne!
North Days Bay: where the only thing not optional is sunscreen.
[April 2025]

Fencing Fiasco!

Yes, our HCC & ECB with the assistance of council 'officers' seem to have again wasted time and money by erecting totally unnecessary sets of posts and ropes in front of the ESSC Clubrooms in Eastbourne. WHY?

Not to contain the rampant penguin invasion or the hordes of rabid dogs apparently.

They sprayed and killed of the flax plants and other native fauna which now lie rotting in the sand, drove away the tui's and other birds which patrons always enjoyed, for what?

And now the kids and the elders stumble and fall across this man made hazard that no one asked for or wanted.

Where is Eastbourne's Residents Association?
Every other 'Bay' has one.
Maybe such a community organisation would help fight for these issues and others instead of leaving it to the 'toothless' ECB.
[April 2025]

Eastbourne’s Never-Ending Cycleway Saga: A Comedy of Errors

Remember what was meant to be a picturesque shared pathway for Eastbourne was swept away at Windy Point when the grand reconstruction ended in a twisted pile of metal—twice. The council insisted the barriers were just “skeletons”.
With the budget bloating from $30 million to $80 million and planning held together with bungee cords and wishful thinking, we are still left questioning whether this project is even remotely seaworthy. At the time, Mayor Campbell Barry dodged interviews faster than a cyclist avoiding debris on Marine Drive.
But what did this f@#$ - up cost? Who was responsible?

MEGA suggests that the metal ‘junk’ heap could/should be turned into a contemporary sculpture and permanently centre-pieced at the intersection and temporary roundabout at Marine Parade/Marine Drive / Muritai Road.
[April 2025]

Double Trouble in Aotearoa: Wizard Finds His Wandering Twin!

In a twist so magical it could only happen in New Zealand, Christchurch’s iconic Wizard has discovered a long-lost twin—living right here in Eastbourne.

Meet Stephen 'Snifter' Phillips: local eccentric, self-styled street sorcerer, and possessor of a booming voice that’s permanently set to “public announcement.” Known for his surreal monologues that dance between genius and gibberish, Snifter had no idea he shared both DNA and dramatic flair with New Zealand’s most spellbinding character.

“I always felt drawn to pointy hats, staffs, and yelling at public transport,” said Snifter. “Now I know why—it’s in the blood.”

After hearing whispers of an Eastbourne wizard who could bend logic and volume in equal measure, the Wizard of Christchurch could be making a ley line north to meet his metaphysical match. Their meeting could be described as a scene somewhere between the Big Bang and a philosophy lecture in a wind tunnel—loud, intense, and deeply confusing.

The resemblance is uncanny. The ability to speak endlessly while making little sense? Identical. Experts believe it may be a rare cosmic anomaly—or just very powerful beards.
MEGA is thrilled to welcome Snifter to the “Council of Confounding Characters,” our Eastbourne answer to the nation’s original enchanter. And yes, we’re now planning a “Battle of the Beards” on Rimu Street: Wizard vs Snifter, winner gets a flagon of kombucha and naming rights to the next incoming southerly.

Stay enchanted, Eastbourne. Greatness is brewing !
[April 2025]

IS ROSS JAMIESON MAKING A COMEBACK?

Rumours swirl as talk of Eastbourne secession heats up.

Word on the windy waterfront is that Ross Jamieson—yes, that Ross Jamieson—
is plotting a political comeback that could shake the shaky foundations of Hutt City Hall.
The man who was literally the last Mayor of Eastbourne before it was gobbled up in the 1989 amalgamation,
Jamieson recently resurfaced during the 2024 legal stoush over the future of community boards. And now?
Well, according to sources who may or may not have overheard something at the dairy, he wants Eastbourne back.

Not just the board. The whole borough. With rumours of a MEGA-inspired push for Eastbourne and the Bays to secede from Lower Hutt at this year’s local body elections, Jamieson is allegedly eyeing the top job—again. That’s right: Mayor of Eastbourne. The Sequel.

“He’s got unfinished business,” one source close to a guy who once mowed his lawn told us.
“Ross believes Eastbourne deserves its own leadership, its own vision, and frankly, its own rates.”

Adding fuel to the fire? The current Mayor of Lower Hutt, Campbell Barry, has announced he’s quitting and won’t seek re-election. With the mayoral chains up for grabs, the timing couldn’t be more perfect for a comeback—and possibly, a breakaway.
The plan? A full-blown ballot-box rebellion. Independence for Eastbourne. Liberation for the Bays.
And Ross Jamieson riding back in—possibly on a cargo bike—as the once and future mayor.
[April 2025]

Come Back Soon.
Nothing Ever Stays The Same At MEGA.

Top of Page